Thursday 13 September 2018

It's Movie time!!!! 7 - No one remembers the original premise.

As I've been playing a lot of "Prison Architect" recently, it's become a necessity to have something on in the background while I wait for money to build up and/or for the inmates to kill each other.




                                                           (1977 Theatrical poster)

An embarrased looking Christopher Lee stars alongside an equally embarrased looking Robert Vaughn (although arguably Vaughns role is less embarrasing) in this B-move romp about an alien invasion.
The people of the planet Alpha, situated in the constellation Orion arrive in our solar system and begin abducting people to perform experiments on. The abductees are then returned to Earth, but as the Alpha people (who call themselves the Legion of the winged serpent) are powerful telepaths, the abductees have been implanted with a post hypnotic suggestion to commit suicide shortly after their return.
Professor Duncan (Vaughn) is a UFO researcher who takes an interest in the sudden spike in UFO sightings and abductions, and believes an invasion is coming, and he is right!.
The aliens leader Ramses (Lee) explains that their secret mission is to find a new homeworld for their people, as their solar systems star is about to go nova.
Earth suits the aliens needs, however as it is already occupied by humans, the Intergalactic league of races, represented mostly by large headed aliens originating from Zeta Reticuli, will oppose them, so Ramses must deal with them before he can put his evil plot to make all humans commit suicide, via the use of a telepathic dommsday weapon, into action.

Despite this film being obviously filmed on a low budget, it somehow manages to be enjoyable in a "I turned off my brain" sort of way. I quite liked the way the story included various bits and pieces from UFOlogy and stories from alledged abductees.



Overall - 7/10

                                                 (Theatrical poster for 1962 English dub)

 In the year 1985, glorious Communist revolution taken over world!, and with petty things such as capitalism put firmly in the past, mankind works toward make benefit for glorious planet Earth!.
During a project to irrigate the Gobi desert, an alien artifact is found, which proves that the Tunguska event was actually the result of an alien spacecraft crashing on Earth.
The worlds leading scentists find that the artifact contains some sort of message, and originated from the planet Venus, so, the scientists embark on a mission into space on the spaceship "Kosmostrator" to make contact with the Venusians in the hopes of establishing a peaceful relationship.....however, they get a bit more than they bargained for....

This film was made in East Germany in 1960, and thus the original version contains much more communist related material than the english dub does, however the film itself is a very interesting one, albeit somewhat scientifically inacurrate and fantastical.
Even amongst all this communism and speculative fiction, the films main message is an anti war one, told via a simple "fantastic adventure" type storyline.
 

Overall - 7/10



                                                               (2014 Theatrical poster)

David is a film archivist who finds that his wife is having an affair, his initial reaction is one of anger but he seemingly refrains from carrying out his violent urges and returns home to his son Billy.
In the course of his work he finds out that the house he lives in was connected with some unsolved murders for 100 years ago. When his wife doesnt return hime, he calls the police, and, sure enough, her body is later found at the bottom of the local canal.
Overwrought with grief, he embarks on a series of erratic behaviours, including claiming to have seen ghosts in the house and at the canal, and blames his wifes death on the haunting.
The question is, was it ghosts who killed his wife?, or is he insane?

Yeah, this isn't a half bad film, albeit a little slow paced, and figuring out what has actually happenned keeps you guessing right to the end. 

Overall - 7/10


                                                               (1996 Video release)

This failed TV pilot takes place in some unspecified future time where the Earth has become so overpopulated that the human race has began reaching out into space and colonising planets.
Several years before the film begins, one of the first colonies, Cynosura, declared its independance from Earth and began its own aggressive expansion (we are helped to realise that the Cynosurans are definitely the baddies because they dress in black uniforms and behave like nazis, whereas the good guys generally wear white or blue uniforms).
The story introduces us to a group of six eager space cadets, who are assigned to the Democratic Republic of Earth corvette "Surprise" for their training cruise. The cadets are drilled by a tough veteran space captain and his equally tough executive officer, however when they begin what they think is a training exersize in the Maraz system, they find themselves under attack by a Cynsuran attack fleet, which has been sent to exterminate the colony on Maraz so they can claim the planet for themselves.
The Captain and the XO are killed in the battle, and it is left up to the cadets ingenuity to defeat the bad guys and save the colony.

I can see why this TV pilot failed, as it borrows a hell of a lot from other sci-fi shows of the time, and has a lot of mid 90s cliches. the special effects are of poor quality for the time, and the acting is terrible, with the good guys being whiter than white saintly figures and the bad guys being little more than comic book villains.
The series itself, had it been picked up, could have gone on to be an interesting drama along the lines of something like "Space: Above and beyond", but only if it shed its "young adult" type of writing style, but alas, the pilot failed to impress, and the series never happenned. 

Overall - 5/10







Thursday 30 August 2018

Its movie time!!!! 6 - The Rebooted Sequel.

Films, yeah, theyre good for passing at least 90 minutes of time. Heres some more time fillers I've watched since the last installment....


                                                             2013 Theatrical Poster

 Some bored rich people indulge in their hobby of kidnapping women of the lower classes and making them fight to the death for their entertainment. Off screen, 46 of the 49 "competitors" have already been eliminated from this years games, leaving the final 6 to bitchslap each other into oblivion in return for the last woman standing being allowed to go free.
Yeah, er, not exactly an original story, as it ends up being pretty much the same as any "fighting tournament" type film youve ever seen, and the twist of having it be an all female fighting tournament doesn't really add much new stuff, other than making the "not-fighting" scenes include lots and lots of fee-fee related stuff.
The evil rich people are straight out of a comic book, being OTT in their wickedness, the successful female fighters form the stock characters of "the virtuous hero", "the bloodthirsty baddie", "the sweet innocent type" and so on and so forth, lots of violent (and somewhat physically impossible for the average person) finishing moves and the films ending, which involves yet another plot twist, is fairly predictable.

I dunno, for a bit of no brainer time wasting blood and guts action, its not a bad film, but as a groundbreaking piece of cinematic action, it falls over several hurdles before it limps over the finishing line.

Overall - 6/10


                                                                1971 Theatrical poster

Many thousands of years ago, the evil witch-queen, Tera, was drugged into a state of suspended animation by a group of priests while she lay in her sarcophagus, practicing her evil magiks. The tomb was sealed and her right hand, after being severed from her body, is thrown to the jackals to prevent her from dying and entering the afterlife. Unfortunately for the priests, the hand is still alive, and manages to escape.
In the present day, a group of archaeologists unearth the tomb. Breaking its seals, they enter and speak the name of the queen, whose name has been purged from history, save for one forgotten carving on the tomb wall, which had not been scrubbed off by some incompetant scribe. They open the sarcophagus, only to find Teras perfectly preserved body inside, still breathing and with blood flowing from the stump of her right wrist.
Years later, the lead archaeologists daughter has grown to become the spitting image of Queen Tera, and she finds she is involved in a plot to ressurect the queen, but for good or evil?.

This is pretty much your standard Hammer Horror type film, but not to the standards of either the Dracula, Frankenstein or even Hammers own "Mummy" films. The extremely attractive Valerie Leon plays a dual role as Tera and Margaret, and genuinely pulls off her role very well.
The story is a little "ho-hum" though, but not by any means boring.

Overall - 8/10


                                                              1972 Theatrical Poster

Following on from the BBC TV series of the same name, "Doomwatch" recieves its own feature film (a common practice at the time).
Dr. Del Shaw from the "Department for the observation and measurement of scientific work", better known as "Doomwatch", arrives in the remote island community of Balfe.
Originally tasked with compiling a report on the enviromental damage sustained in the area following a recent oil spillage, Dr. Shaw becomes suspicious when he sees severely deformed people in the otherwise quiet and somewhat backward village, and locals explanations about inbreeding stop being convincing after a few incidences of people becoming violent and irrational, also doesn't help their case when some dead bodies start turning up.
Could an old military waste dumping ground out at sea hold the key?......maybe.

This is a pretty run of the mill "science gone wrong" type of story, but what makes this films premise different is that it doesnt feel the need to go OTT with special effects and science fiction explanations as to why things are happenning, althouh I'd wager if the film makers had a larger budget they'd probably have liked to jazz the film up a bit (NOTE - the original TV series was notorious for having bargain basement special effects, as were numerous BBC programs at the time).
That said, this films very simple cinematograhy and easy to understand mystery/thriller type plot makes for good viewing, even if it looks dated in the modern age of lens flare and CGI explosions.

Overall - 8/10